TheExpeditioner Mailbag: An Invite From Prof. Albus Dumbledore


TheExpeditioner Mailbag: An Invite From Prof. Albus Dumbledore

Dear Matt,

It has come to my attention that you may have a bit of doubt regarding Hogwart’s School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Upon my request, the Ministry of Magic believes, along with Hogwarts, that to mutually benefit one another, muggles and non-muggles should live together. It is with that in mind, on June 18th, the doors will open and for the first time ever, muggles will be allowed to mingle the streets of Hogsmeade and the corridors of Hogwarts. Prepare yourself to witness what you may think has never existed: an alternate reality, and the unbelievable. Our magical world may at first come as a shock to those unaware. However, I personally invite you to join me in the opening ceremonies. Together, we shall cast away the invisibility charm, and step foot into a world, our world, never before seen by muggle eyes at the grand opening of The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida.

If you would be so kind as to take a walk with me. We realize the inability of humans to teleport, so we have designed what you call an “entrance gate” near the exit platform of the Hogwart’s Express. The cobbled streets of Hogsmeade will open in front of your eyes. We shall pass the very same shops included in the Harry Potter series, Ollivander’s Wand Shop, Zonko’s novelties (which I feel you may enjoy the most), Derevish and Banges school supplies, and my favorite, Honeyduke’s Homemade Sweets.

Perhaps it is a more magical experience you require. Rather than inundating Hogwart’s admission department with muggle requests, we have created several experiences that put you right into the action, without ever enrolling in Defense Against the Dark Arts. At Flight of the Hippogriff, you will go on a training run through the pumpkin patch and past Hagrid’s hut. Please excuse me, as I am still not used to addressing muggles quite yet. A Hippogriff is an animal of our world that has the head of an eagle and body of a horse. We will instruct you on the proper way to approach the Hippogriff for your safety.

The Dragon Challenge rollercoaster allows you to choose between the Chinese Fireball and the Hungarian Horntail. The feisty dragons take you past the Triwizard Cup and Goblet of Fire as you intertwine and nearly collide just outside of town.

Standing guard over the grounds is our very own Hogwart’s Castle. With very little magical alterations, we’ve created a path to some of the iconic places you may be familiar with in the castle: my office, the Gryffindor common room, the Room of Requirement, and more. Please remember, though, Hogwarts is a continuously functioning school and we ask that you respect that. We would take no pleasure in sending muggle-borns to Azkaban. From the castle, we have also opened a coaster called the Forbidden Journey that takes you over the whole of the school grounds.

Please send your owl with a reply to my invitation, I will pass on word of your arrival and save you the cost of a ticket. Oops again, I’m sorry for my naivety. The Owlery in Hogsmeade now accepts ordinary muggle post. I look forward to seeing you. I have already made our reservations at the Three Broomsticks, Hogsmeade’s outstanding restaurant, where we can sip Butter Beer’s into the wee hours of the night. You might like to know I have just recently mastered a hangover charm that may come in handy during your visit here.

Sincerely,

Prof. Albus Dumbledore


Published on May 27, 2010

  • http://www.candicedoestheworld.com Candice

    Holy shit. I'd go in a heartbeat.

  • Jon

    Don't lie, Matt. I know you've got a heart framed picture of Hermoine, next to a souvenir magic wand on your nightstand. Admit it…

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/TheExpeditioner TheExpeditioner

    Orlando and its tourist industry is basically the complete opposite of what this site stands for, but I have to admit, I kind of want to go to this. Sad, or loyal Harry Potter fan? you decide.