In anticipation of the maiden voyages of the Oasis of the Seas and the Allure of the Seas, two of the largest cruiseships ever built, Frommer’s setting the record straight on his view of cruises: they blow. Especially these two behemoths, whose seven-day “trips” spend half their time at sea, and the other half dumping there 5,000+ passengers at three, uniquely bland ports.

Art wonders in his blog, why even bother leaving the dock? Could not the same experience be had and much fuel saved by staying in port in Ft. Lauderdale?

So these are the farthest-removed imitations of a travel experience ever devised. The average passenger will perhaps decide to spend all seven days simply on the ship. And the question therefore arises (I’ve posed it several times before): why must the ships leave Fort Lauderdale? Why don’t they simply remain docked in Florida? Would any passenger know the difference?

The craziest part to me are those defending the idea of the cruise in the comments section under his post. It’s a mystery to me too Arthur.

My own reasons for disliking cruises, in no particular order: Mediocre food, cramped rooms, little to no exposure to other cultures, tourists, shuffleboard, Norwegian sailors, mirrored hallways, karaoke, itineraries, gift shops, buffets, low water pressure. The list could go on and on, don’t get me started.